1. |
Gradient
03:22
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Try not to freak ya
‘Cause I’m an alien
Can’t even tell ya
Where I’m from
It’s complicated
Tried to be like ya
But my melanin’s a sin
Can’t even show ya
All the papercuts I’ve been holding in
I live in a world where left is right
Do you see me? Do you see me?
I’m that gradient that turns you blind
Do you see me, ‘cause I can’t see me
In your eyes
I’m that gradient that turns you blind
I’m that gradient that turns you blind
I’m that gradient, I’m that gradient, I’m that gradient that turns you blind
Wash me till I’m white
Like I’m a neophyte
Spoke in a foreign tongue
Since I was young
It’s complicated
I’m saturated
But you want me faded
My insides shatter
Like the pieces of a million prisms
I live in a world where left is right
Do you see me? Do you see me?
I’m that gradient that turns you blind
Do you see me, ‘cause I can’t see me
In your eyes
I’m that gradient that turns you blind
I’m that gradient that turns you blind
So look at me, what do you see?
I spent my whole life trying to be
I’m not your kind
Your kingdom’s not designed
For me
I turn you blind
I’m that gradient, I’m that gradient
I’m that gradient, I’m that gradient
Microinvalidations:
Subtly or obviously denying the experiences, feelings, or thoughts
That people of colour have
For example:
“I don’t see colour”
“We’re all human beings”
“All lives matter”
What it does is make people of colour feel
Invisible
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2. |
My Party (Radio Edit)
02:43
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|
I hate myself
I’ll be okay
I wanna be all skin and bones
Party all day
Like I don’t care
Oh, I just wanna be alone
I eat too much
I throw it up
Drink alcohol
To numb it all
My body is a rave
And all I crave
Is euphoria
I loathe myself
Such a cliche
Swear I don’t wanna feel this way
I crush my pills
Just like my feels
My thoughts are spinning like the wheels
A race car out of control
My thumb just doesn’t stop the scroll
My body is a rave
And all I crave
Is euphoria
Welcome to my party
Let’s get high
Welcome to my party
Where I’ll cry
I’m gonna dance to the melodies falling apart
I’m gonna dance to the beat of my breaking heart
I think too much and I fuck it up
I ruminate on things I hate
Where’s my hype
I’m supposed to be the A-type
Archetype, prototype, stereotype
Pick me up
I fall again
I mess it up
I’ll be okay
Just gotta figure it out
Gimme a minute
Gotta figure it out
Promise I’ll get it
Welcome to my party
Let’s get high
Welcome to my party
Where I’ll cry
I’m gonna dance to the melodies falling apart
I’m gonna dance to the beat of my breaking heart
It’s my party
I guess I’ll cry if I want to
I hate myself
But you never knew that, did you?
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3. |
||||
|
Hold me, hold me
I just need somebody
Somebody who gets me
I just want an escape
Tonight
I feel you
Hold me I just need somebody
Somebody who gets me
I just want an escape tonight
Like honey, you’re so fucking lovely
You’re so fucking lovely
I just want an escape
|
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4. |
||||
5. |
Hold Me (Chaii Remix)
01:23
|
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6. |
My Party (Extended Mix)
04:32
|
|||
|
I hate myself
I’ll be okay
I wanna be all skin and bones
Party all day
Like I don’t care
Oh, I just wanna be alone
I eat too much
I throw it up
Drink alcohol
To numb it all
My body is a rave
And all I crave
Is euphoria
I loathe myself
Such a cliche
Swear I don’t wanna feel this way
I crush my pills
Just like my feels
My thoughts are spinning like the wheels
A race car out of control
My thumb just doesn’t stop the scroll
My body is a rave
And all I crave
Is euphoria
Welcome to my party
Let’s get high
Welcome to my party
Where I’ll cry
I’m gonna dance to the melodies falling apart
I’m gonna dance to the beat of my breaking heart
I think too much and I fuck it up
I ruminate on things I hate
Where’s my hype
I’m supposed to be the A-type
Archetype, prototype, stereotype
Pick me up
I fall again
I mess it up
I’ll be okay
Just gotta figure it out
Gimme a minute
Gotta figure it out
Promise I’ll get it
Welcome to my party
Let’s get high
Welcome to my party
Where I’ll cry
I’m gonna dance to the melodies falling apart
I’m gonna dance to the beat of my breaking heart
It’s my party
I guess I’ll cry if I want to
I hate myself
But you never knew that, did you?
|
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7. |
Gradient (Instrumental)
03:21
|
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8. |
||||
9. |
||||
10. |
||||
11. |
||||
|
I hate myself
I’ll be okay
I wanna be all skin and bones
Party all day
Like I don’t care
Oh, I just wanna be alone
I eat too much
I throw it up
Drink alcohol
To numb it all
My body is a rave
And all I crave
Is euphoria
I loathe myself
Such a cliche
Swear I don’t wanna feel this way
I crush my pills
Just like my feels
My thoughts are spinning like the wheels
A race car out of control
My thumb just doesn’t stop the scroll
My body is a rave
And all I crave
Is euphoria
Welcome to my party
Let’s get high
Welcome to my party
Where I’ll cry
I’m gonna dance to the melodies falling apart
I’m gonna dance to the beat of my breaking heart
I think too much and I f- it up
I ruminate on things I hate
Where’s my hype
I’m supposed to be the A-type
Archetype, prototype, stereotype
Pick me up
I fall again
I mess it up
I’ll be okay
Just gotta figure it out
Gimme a minute
Gotta figure it out
Promise I’ll get it
Welcome to my party
Let’s get high
Welcome to my party
Where I’ll cry
I’m gonna dance to the melodies falling apart
I’m gonna dance to the beat of my breaking heart
It’s my party
I guess I’ll cry if I want to
I hate myself
But you never knew that, did you?
|
||||
12. |
||||
|
I hate myself
I’ll be okay
I wanna be all skin and bones
Party all day
Like I don’t care
Oh, I just wanna be alone
I eat too much
I throw it up
Drink alcohol
To numb it all
My body is a rave
And all I crave
Is euphoria
I loathe myself
Such a cliche
Swear I don’t wanna feel this way
I crush my pills
Just like my feels
My thoughts are spinning like the wheels
A race car out of control
My thumb just doesn’t stop the scroll
My body is a rave
And all I crave
Is euphoria
Welcome to my party
Let’s get high
Welcome to my party
Where I’ll cry
I’m gonna dance to the melodies falling apart
I’m gonna dance to the beat of my breaking heart
I think too much and I f- it up
I ruminate on things I hate
Where’s my hype
I’m supposed to be the A-type
Archetype, prototype, stereotype
Pick me up
I fall again
I mess it up
I’ll be okay
Just gotta figure it out
Gimme a minute
Gotta figure it out
Promise I’ll get it
Welcome to my party
Let’s get high
Welcome to my party
Where I’ll cry
I’m gonna dance to the melodies falling apart
I’m gonna dance to the beat of my breaking heart
It’s my party
I guess I’ll cry if I want to
I hate myself
But you never knew that, did you?
|
||||
13. |
||||
|
Hold me, hold me
I just need somebody
Somebody who gets me
I just want an escape
Tonight
I feel you
Hold me I just need somebody
Somebody who gets me
I just want an escape tonight
Like honey, you’re so fucking lovely
You’re so f- lovely
I just want an escape
|
||||
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